Controversial Decisions in Comics

I was thinking about doing a post about things I thought worked out well that sounded like awful ideas and things that seemed great on paper and worked out terribly in execution in comics for the last ten years. I have some pretty bold opinions on each of these topics and I won't mince words. Here goes:

Things that worked out well against the odds:

1. Bucky -- What else do I have to say? They brought Bucky back. It was one of the things you can't do and they did it. Only Joe Q and Brubaker could make this not the worst idea ever. I liked the Winter Soldier character. I still like the Bucky Cap with his pistol and bionic commando arm. It'll be interesting to see how the two caps issue pans out. They obvi can't permanently get rid of Steve; he's too important to leading the heroes. But I could see him acting as a master strategist, like the old Bruce in Batman Beyond. In the end, he's still got the super soldier serum in his veins and like 100 years of field experience, so it's hard to imagine him not fighting with his people. But, yeah, BUCKY. It's the third rail of comics deaths. It permanent. Except it's not now. And it was great. I love Captain America for the first time ever.

2. Iron Fist -- I've already gushed a lot about this book elsewhere recently. But c'mon. He's as much of an underdog as Morrison's Animal Man was. No one gives a flying fist about this noob. He's just so lame. Even his colors make you think he's working at Sbarro rather than superheroing. But this book was killer when Brubaker was running it. And it could be again if there was a great writer. The back story is all laid out. The roster of villains and associated heroes is set up. There's a lot of possibilities here. I think we'll here more from Iron Fist before it's all said and done. Dude, kung-fu is so cool.

3. Dark Reign -- This is the cross-over of the decade, for sure. The problem with everything else that Marvel did was that they couldn't define a big bad well enough. House of M it was Scarlet Witch. Well, they're not killing her. They'll just make her good again. Or blame it on Magneto. Or both. Civil War it's Iron Man. And they simultaneously made 896412764 billion dollars on his movie. Kill him? Unlikely. Keep him a villain? Not counting on it. Secret Invasion? Faceless, nameless noob Skrulls. Even the Queen was just a Spiderwoman lookalike. Don't want that fake hottie to die. Nope, ONLY Dark Reign features a big bad worthy of the entire Marvel U.'s attention. And they turned Osborn into Luthor, a world-threatening bad guy, not just Spiderman's loony archnemesis. It was a deft maneuver. It's effects on numerous books were overwhelmingly positive. It's still ongoing, so there could be big missteps in ending this story, but so far so good. They'd better let Spidey get the big swing in on him to finish it off or they'll have made a huge mistake.

4. DC Rebirths -- Ollie. Hal. Barry. If not for the first two, their namesakes would have drug down their mantles. Green Lantern and Green Arrow are only and always Hal and Ollie. Sorry Arsenal, Speedy, Guy, Black Dude, and Kyle. You guys are supporting cast to the greats. Barry wasn't needed really (I actually like Wally West and even liked the little kid from the future version of Flash), but he is cool and will bring more credibility to the character. I really liked the Kevin Smith Green Arrow; let's be honest -- everyone did. Even those of you now that will say you hated it or hated him and always thought his writing sucked enjoyed the series when it was on time and before Clerks 2 and the Bennifer movie. Geoff Johns Flash is the best work ever done on that character and it will be again (the first issue of his new series just released yesterday). I honestly think John GL was terrible until GL Corps, which I suspect he was in a holding pattern waiting for because of Infinite Crisis, which lasted about 35 years. Thank god it arrived when it did. It was awesome. Blackest Night was a bit of a limp around showy story without any real soul, but some of the minis and a lot of the smaller moments in the series were good. At any rate, bringing all these characters back could have been a disaster. It wasn't. It was pretty cool, actually.

5. Hellboy movies -- I love Hellboy. If you are a comic book fan and still haven't read this, you're missing an absolute masterpiece. Everything about Hellboy rules. It has levity and seriousness in perfect balance. It's a cooler, more well-researched Spiderman book. Man, it's great. But I was pretty worried about how they'd make the movies work. There's so much detail, so much high-minded material, in the books that it seemed virtually impossible to make an under two hour treatment that did the stories justice. They did it. Twice (four times if you count the animated shows -- and I do because they're really cool too). Dark Horse may be the fourth name in comics, but they have one of the absolute top properties with this franchise. Make Mine Mignola.

6. Wolverine's Son -- X-23 is lame. Dakken is cool. There, I said it. Wolverine Origins, overall, has been a pretty solid book. It has had its ups and downs, but it introduced this wicked awesome character who has a real story, real motivation, and real staying power. He's like the Joker with a healing factor and sweet claws. He's been a stand out in the Dark Avengers stories and since taking over the main Wolverine title has really provided some solid stories. I'd have guessed this to be a major flop, but it looks like a winner.

7. Watchmen movie -- You don't have to love it to like it. And I like it a lot. I watched it 4 times in the theater. I watched it twice on Blu Ray already. I'm going to watch it a lot more. They changed some things. Inevitable. Even the crucial alterations in the ending were sensible if imperfect. I don't even care about the blue dicks. Manhattan's soliloquy on the moon was awesome. The Comedian was awesome. The settings were awesome. Rorschach in the prison was awesome. It was as good a Watchmen movie as anyone could make. I had chills the whole time because I was watching a true to the material adaptation of one of the greatest pieces of fiction ever written. And if you didn't like it you wanted it to be more than the book, which was entirely unrealistic. Get over it. Long live the Watchmen. But don't let anyone else write a sequel or spin-offs or anything of the sort. See this story for warnings: http://www.bleedingcool.com/2010/02/03/get-ready-for-watchmen-2/.

8. Straczynski's Spiderman -- Why Marvel can't create a Spiderman series worthy of the character is beyond me. This property has suffered more than the characters in the book, and that's really saying something. In the early part of the decade, Babylon 5 creator and sci-fi geekgasm-inducing writer reinvented the character in a productive way for a solid run, but then ran directly into Civil War and editorial demand to update the character. He unmasked. He got an Iron Man type suit with all types of gadgets. He got Aunt May killed. Everything got retconned. And now Spidey is in worse shape than ever creatively. They actually redid some clone saga era stories, thinking what could possibly get worse, I'd imagine. But the Straczynski run had some notable moments (WTC tribute issue, for instance) and some cool ideas (the spider totem and that huge bug monster that was practically invincible). The work was solid. For an unknown comic writer to just cut loose on a character so loved was nice to see. Hopefully we can get back there.

9. Marvel Zombies Series One -- Like any other successful thing at the House of Ideas, they took it too far and let Fred Van Lente write sequels, but the original Kirkman series was mega-cool. The Suidam covers alone make it worth checking out. But the stories are funny. The art is gore par excellance. And the characters are unhinged. They've made the zombie universe a part of the regular continuity, so be prepared for it to always be lurking around the corner, ready to sneak up and bite the brains of your favorite heroes and villains.

10. Plastic Man in the JLA -- Think about this character for a minute. He's basically invincible. He stealthy (except the color scheme, which, be honest, he could work around). I know that we never see he or Reed or even Ralph (R.I.P.) do much with their powers offensively, but they could. Elasticity has its advantages beyond defense (ever been shot by a rubber band?). I really liked this character as a Leaguer. He tied the team together. He kept them from taking themselves too seriously. And he was useful. Bring him back. Oh, and the Kyle Baker stories were great too. A really good series with strong art direction and fun plots.

Stuff that was crap:

1. Dark Knight 2: Electric Boogaloo -- The crappiest of the crap. Highly anticipated. Highly disappointing. I loved the original Dark Knight, but honestly it didn't age well. Since the comics industry has become more willing to take risks, there are Batman stories and stories about other mainstream heroes that stand up well to this dystopian investigation into the Bat. But the sequel has next to nothing going for it. The art looks just awful. The story is disjuncted, and not in a creative way. It's Frank Miller at his most pretentious. I wish he'd just stay away from comics from now on.

2. Stan Lee Presents... -- Oh man, what drivel. At least reading old Stan books you can see the creative juices flowing. Here you just get the worst of everything. Aimless stories. Jaw-droppingly bad dialogue. Terrible cliches. Marry it with awful art and you have books that more appropriately belong as kindling. I think Marvel has found a great job for Stan: appearing once in each of their movies and movie property commercials. It works. No more writing for you, but we still love ya. Excelsior.

3. Claremont on Exiles -- Do you remember the Exiles? I do. This book started off awesomely. And against all odds. It was a story doomed to failure. Universe-hopping and time traveling mutants that are kinda like ones you know, but aren't. Sounds like a Cross-time Caper could be kicking off. BUT Judd Winick did a great job on this book for a very long time. It was savvy. It had a mystery at its heart. The characters had feeling and the action was strong. It was a top 10 book for awhile imho. Along comes Chris "I made the X-Men cool" Claremont. He saddled up on the book, dropped his pants, and took a crap on everything that was great about it. He made the characters suck. He neutered the major story points. He did everything possible to ruin this book forever. In the decade, Claremont has worked on 4-5 different X-properties that I can remember; every one was awful. I can't believe he is STILL writing these books. Fans, stop supporting this terrible cretinous bastard. If you want to read Claremont, buy the Dark Phoenix trade. This category could just as well be "everything Claremont did."

4. Frank Miller's All-Star Batman and Robin -- How do you make a Batman book drawn by Jim Lee terrible? Enlist the help of Frank Miller. He turned Batman into a brutish thug rather than the thinking man's fighter we've known him to be. He actually made the series more homoerotic than the classic "accidental porn" of the 50's. He paced the book like you were running backward on the cosmic treadmill. And, he delayed it to the point that only 7 issues have been released as of today (the series started 2 years ago). Suck it, Frank. You're the worst.

5. Infinite Crisis -- What happened in this series? I have no idea except that Batman died (post hoc spoiler alert). It seemed to last approximately 100 years. It had people riding dogs and Wonder Woman with fangs. I honestly just didn't get it. Morrison's DC work has been largely incomprehensible to me. Maybe it's because I don't know the source material as well (I've read far more Marvel comics), but I honestly think that the stories are simply poorly put together and terribly executed. I can't understand what was sensible about this story. I will say that the fallout from Bruce's death was cool. Dick as the Bat has worked. But the main story, its villain, and the effects on the universe were just not something I got. Huge investment for little pay off imho.

6. Ultimate X-Men -- I'm going to come out swinging at someone I really like here. I'm an Invincible fan. I'm a Walking Dead fan. Kirkman screwed the pooch on Ultimate X-Men. I don't know if he's exclusively to blame for the downward direction the book took, but he was at the helm when it took a huge dive. And it didn't have to. I think that the beginning of the book was well executed. It had all of the pieces put together to be as good as Ultimate Spider-Man, maybe better. It's the X-Men, damn it. But the push to tell an Apocalypse story so early. And the introduction of too many mutants too quickly just felt hurried. Pacing. Take your time. I know you had to have quick pay-offs in your creator-owned stuff at Image to get noticed, but you're on a big title now. Take. Your. Time. Tell good stories. Don't give in to fanboydem. Ultimate X-Men should still be going and good.

7. Astonishing X-Men -- Oh man, I'm going to get grief for this one. Joss Whedon. John Cassaday. Holy COW! How do I not like this? It is the one and only problem I have with Buffy: villains. Whedon can't write a bad guy or create a bad guy that doesn't suck. Danger? CMON! "I'm a robot who knows all of your moves and stuff." "What? No I'm not fucking AMAZO! Shut up dude." "I'm not Ultron either, dick." In spite of all of the things that this book did right, it remains a sore spot that Joss created such a n00bish foil to take on this uber version of the X-Men. And we had to trade Kitty for Colossus. That was lame too. I was as excited as anyone about this series when it was coming out. I was as disappointed as anyone when it ended like it did. That said, I'm loving Buffy. I'm psyched for Avengers. Calm down, Whedonites.

8. Jeph Loeb -- As a person. Jeph Loeb blows.

9. Marvel's 3rd installments -- I'm not going to belabor the point. Everyone knows that these movies are terrible. It's not worth making the best points about how shitty they are. I'll say this, if you can bone the Dark Phoenix story, you can bone anything. Of course, Brett Ratner and Bryan Singer are largely interchangeable. Spider-Man 3 was doomed the second that people included a Todd McFarlane creation in a real movie. Nuff said!

10. Eternals -- Swing and a miss. Gods and monsters stories have done well for Marvel in this decade, with notable runs on Thor and Hercules and even some strong work on Ares in several titles. With Neil "I can do no wrong" Gaiman and John "Living legend" Romita Jr. at the helm this book seemed destined for comic greatness. It was greeted with lackluster sales, a dragging story, and no real continuity impact. It went out with a whimper to say the least. A huge damned alien totem pole ship lands in San Francisco and hardly anyone cares only three years later (I guess the distraction of the X-Men moving in got every one's attention). It's shocking how poorly Gaiman's forays into Marvel comics have performed. My suggestion is to let the man tell HIS stories, not to play with your toys, and see what he can produce. Marvel seems to have a good relationship with Neil. They should certainly keep letting him write books, but maybe let him do something original or creator-owned. He's not a superhero comic book writer. Don't try and force him to be.

That's a long post. I'm done for now. Hope you're enjoying this as much as I am. And pass the word. I'd like to get people interested and involved in posting and commenting here as much as possible.